Eschew Obfuscation

Why I post personal stuff

Posted by Max Dunn Wed, 12 Apr 2006 15:11:00 GMT

A lot of people think it is a little weird that I put so much personal stuff in my web site and blog and I can understand their point. However, here are some reasons why I do this.

The first reason is that it often helps other people. This was illustrated last year when some friends (I will call them J and E) were visiting us and we got to talking about our fears. I mentioned that I often feel anxious about meeting with people. E said that she often felt this way too, but J never felt this way and couldn’t understand her feelings. So by admitting my feelings, it helped E know that others can feel the same way and helped J know that E wasn’t crazy.

The second reason is that I don’t want people to think I am perfect. This is an even more controversial area especially since I like to start and run companies, and many people think that to be a CEO, you need to be a “strong” leader, which to them means you never show your fears or weaknesses. However to me, being a strong leader means empowering your team, building them up and using their talents to the fullest, and one way to help with this is to not try be a superman CEO, but be a real person instead. And if someone doesn’t really know me, and reads in this blog that I am often “anxious meeting people” without really knowing me and knowing that am good at overcoming this fear and am actually really good with people, I wouldn’t want to work with them anyways.

Thirdly, I like to have a permanent record of the never-ending and constantly changing trials and achievments my family and I experience so they won’t get shrouded by the fogs of time. By writing them down in a public place, my family and friends can look back at them at any time and remember, which would not be possible if I kept them all in a private journal.

Fourth, I have a lot of thoughts floating around in my head and writing them down is calming because I know they won’t be lost so I can let them go. It is like Dumbledore’s Pensieve in the Harry Potter series, where he can draw thoughts out of his and store them until a later time when he wants to remember them again.

Lastly, what does it matter if strangers can see some of our intimate thoughts? We are likely never to know of it or be affected by it in any way. But we are all human, and the more we can admit it, the more we will be drawn together and connected. AA has a great saying: “Don’t compare your insides to other people’s outsides.” And this is why blogging personal stuff is so hard: we are exposing our insides in public, and feeling weird because others are only showing their outsides. But in reality, we all have insides and by putting our insides on the outside, maybe we can better relate to each other as real people with similar faults, fears and aspirations.